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Five days ago, a professor of mine, in a class that I am required to take, that is centered around 18th century European (read: white, male) philosophy, announced to the class that I had visited him during his office hours to let him know that I struggled to understand the course material (this was in an effort to meet with a new professor and discuss with him my feelings about his class - and people wonder why many women of color often resist asking for help).

This is a class in which I already feel insecure, due to my race, gender, and inability to relate to any of the material on a personal and political level.

How humiliating. I’ve written about insecurities in the classroom before, so I won’t reiterate. For those of you that don’t understand why this is problematic and hurtful, please do not contact me about this.

Lesson learned: the next time I visit a professor, I will ask for a verbal contract of confidentiality, even if it sounds ridiculous.

About me:

"you are like the small little torch of hope resisting the winds of reality, trying to set '-isms' on fire" -- s.k.

 

February 2008
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